Libraries

It's summer (not that you'd notice looking out upon the grey rainy sky) which means it must be time for my annual blog post. Enjoy it, revel in it. I like to think that my lack of output means that I only post when I have something really important to say, that my posts are a fine vintage, a rare and potent thing to be savoured and enjoyed, not drunk every day with a Tesco microwave curry.

Actually the truth is I'm just a lazy bastard who can't be arsed to keep this up.

However every so often, something really gets in my head, and try as I might I can't get rid of it, so I disgorge it to you now. This year, I'd like to talk about libraries. You may have heard that the legal challenge was blocked on the proposals to close/transfer to the community five libraries on the Isle of Wight. If not you can read it here:

http://t.co/fIifexH

http://www.iwcp.co.uk/news/news/campaigners-lose-court-fight-against-libraries-closures-39843.aspx

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm sad to see libraries go, however I have this feeling that, rather than the cold-hearted decision to deny the public it's service, what we're seeing is a result of a bigger issue, one that has changed the way people get information.

Can you guess what it is?

Yep that's right, it's the internet - congratulations, you've won a prize*

Well actually it's not just the internet, but the internet is a big part of it, I believe there is another reason too, but I'll come to that in a bit. There was a time, and I'm only talking about 10/15 years ago, when the internet wasn't a big thing, it was something that that the internet was a niche place, the general public didn't use it, mostly it was business and universities (that's significant - hold that in your head) using it. If your average member of the general public wanted to find something out, they toddled down to their local library and read about it in a book. These days, you want to find something, you fire up your computer/smartphone and you google it - the information is there, at your fingertips. Job done. No longer is there the need to spend a couple of hours getting to and from your library, plus another couple of hours heaving through a weighty tome trying to find out who invented the marshmallow slice.

One of the reason why I feel that the internet is considered such a fount of knowledge is the fact that when it was starting up, universities (told you it'd be important) picked it up as a way of sharing information. When I was at University in 96, I was regularly encouraged to use the internet to seek out research and share mine through it. What we, and other graduates now have locked into our head is the internet is the first step in any research. This is something we have passed onto our families and offspring so that they now believe that the internet is the first (and last) place to look. People don't even consider a library when thinking of a place to find out information.

The second reason is a far more fundamental change in the way those who read books get them. Back when libraries first started up, they provided a valuable service allowing people who could not have access to books - which were expensive items far beyond the reach of the average man or woman. These days, internet aside, books are a far more accessible option, with shops offering cheap and available books on all subjects. If your like me, you don't go to a library, rather you have built a library in your own home. Everything else you need to find out about you go to the internet for.

Libraries have tried various tactics to solve these issues, but I fear that they are fighting a battle lost long ago: free computer access is good, but computers and smartphones are now so ubiquitous and cheap most people now have it through a smartphone, which provides access for only a small monthly payment for the connection; they tried renting DVDs, just when the internet started offering cheap downloads. Ultimately, the core of their business has gone elsewhere, and no amount of encouragement is going to bring them back - information is just too freely available now.

Whilst it is sad to see them go, I believe that the time has come to let them pass into history in their current form. It's time to admit that libraries, while a great idea in their time, now have been overtaken, in the same way the internal combustion engine brought about the end of the horse and cart.

Rest in peace Libraries, you've earned it.


*You haven't won a prize**

**Apologies to James for stealing his line.

My least favourite word

So, over a year since I last updated my blog, I'm back again. I'd say you all missed me, but seeing as no bugger follows me anyway I know I'm just peeing into my wetsuit on here. Anyway, just in case someone does pitch upon this page by accident: "hello, and welcome, come back in a years time and there might be a 4th post on here..."

But enough of that, and on to my least favourite word.

It used to be 'empower', as in "We have empowered this person to wipe the arse-biscuits off their nether regions". For me, every use of it can be replaced by 'patronising' instead. So our arse-biscuit ridden person would now read:

"We have been patronising this person to wipe the arse-biscuits off their nether regions"

Go on and try it yourself if you're truly bored.

But recently, a new word has started appearing:

'access'

Not a bad word in itself, and can be quite properly used to describe an entrance. However recently I've found it used in the following ways:

"...most breaks will be accessed by a child with..."

"...some courses can be accessed by you for a small charge."

What they actually mean is used, visited, chosen. The acid test as to whether a word is being used in a silly way, is to try and use it to describe the mundane actoins of your day, for example:

"I went to the snack bar and accessed a sandwich for my lunch."

"After three hours of painful constipation, I finally managed to access the toilet."

Silly isn't it?

So lets think about how we use words, and if you come across someone who does use access in this way, feel free to correct them, preferably with a mallet or similarly blunt object.

Festival season

So we find ourselves once again fast approaching the Isle of Wight Festival, the event that has in the past acted (for me at least) as the start point for the summer festivals. Yes I know that there are plenty of festivals before this one, in fact we seem to be at breaking point with the number of festivals going on in this country (not to mention abroad) and it seems that barely a weekend passes without being presented with two or three festivals all waiting to make us part with our money and I intend to attend several of them. But it's still the IW that is the marker.

Except for me this year it isn't.

For the first time since the rebirth of the festival in 2002 I won't be attending. It wasn't a decision I made lightly either. 

There are several reasons for this, the first being a simple financial consideration, I am venturing to Glastonbury in a fortnight and only have a limited number of beer tokens in a month. Another is that a lot of my friends aren't going either and so would be less of a group as previous years. But the fact is that both of those reasons are pretty flimsy - I have been offered a free ticket through work and have been going to festivals long enough now to know how to avoid the expensive food and beer and do it on a shoestring, similarly I also know that festivals are as much about making new friends as well as spending time with existing ones.

No the real reason that I'm not going is simply this:

I just don't care for it anymore.

It's become too crowded, to commercial and quite frankly the bands on just don't appeal to me this year - Bananarama headlining the big top? M&S sandwiches for sale? 60,000 people trying to get round a site build for half that. You can keep it I'm afraid - it's just not what I want from a festival anymore - give me Bestival any day, it amazes me how two completely polar opposites festivals have sprung up on the Island. By contrast Bestival has it so very, very right and has the magic. Giddings would do well to take a long look at his partner if he's going to take the festival forward.

Newton Faulkner and Facebook in a public place

I went to see Newton Faulkner last night, and can I say that if you get a chance go and see him, he is a hugely talented songwriter who has a great rapport with the audience and carries his celebrity very lightly indeed. Not above taking the mickey out of himself and his songs (the speeded up version of UFO a personal favourite), it made for a great evening in the company of a man who is adept at making you feel like a friend rather than a punter.

Well I say a great evening, one thing spoiled it for me...


Facebook.


Not the website itself you understand, I'm a fan of that application and while away many hours playing games, taking random surveys to discover what kind of Muppet/Star Wars character/TV Show/Alcoholic beverage I am, as well as reading about the day-to-day happenings of people I haven't spoken to since I left school 20 years ago. Just to make it clear that I'm fine with that and the way it revels in extreme pointlessness.

No, my problem lies in the way people use it, or, to be more precise, the way one woman used it whilst sat right in front of me.
Having paid the best part of £20 to go and see the musical stylings of Mr Faulkner, she proceeded to spend the entire evening glued to her iPhone tapping away furiously as she responded to her virtual friends, presumably with posts that informed them how great he was, taking photos and posting them up in real-time. Not only did it strike me as highly rude that she obviously valued her status update over the performance, but it distracted me, and from what I could tell, those around me, as her phone shone out in the darkness drawing the eye from the far more interesting happenings on stage to her own personal dribblings on the internet.

So what did I do about this woman? Well I did what any self respecting Englishman would do - I said nothing and stared hard into the back of her head while I imagined the security guards hauling her out for disrespecting the performance. Then moaned about it in a blog!

I shall end today with a plea to any potential readers out there - please, please please, if you go out to show, sit back and enjoy it, but save the reviews until after the event and I'm out of the theatre.

Thankyou